Imagine a set of identical twins: Twin A worries about gaining weight, so to avoid this, eats lots of vegetables, shuns highly refined foods, and makes sure to burn off “excess” calories through lots of exercise. Twin B has a different outlook and eats plenty of vegetables because vegetables are delicious, avoids highly refined foods because too much leads to feeling lousy, and is physically active because it’s fun, invigorating, and relaxing. While to an observer their behaviors may look the same and their weights may be equal, their experiences and health will be decidedly different. Food Twin A runs of the risk of having food become a fixation and eating turn into an activity that’s filled with anxiety. Everything consumed is analyzed and reduced to its component parts: How many calories does it have? What nutrients does it contain? Is it “clean” enough? Is it allowed on whatever diet is currently being followed? Physical hunger is distrusted and ignored for as long as possible. At the same time though, food is used as a distraction or to numb emotional pain. This is often followed with a large helping of guilt and shame for dessert. For Twin B, food is chosen because it nourishes physically and/or emotionally and is to be enjoyed and shared. No single item or category is demonized or deified, but neither is diet’s impact on health ignored. Physical hunger is acknowledged and filled by eating food, while emotional needs are filled in ways that are kind and healing. Fitness At times, Twin A enjoys being physically active, but there are almost always overlays of punishment and penance. If too many calories were consumed (or will be in the future), they must be paid for with exercise. Activities are chosen by the number of calories that can be burned off or as a down-payment on permission to eat in the future. Time, intensity, repetitions, and distance are badges of honor. Pain, fatigue, and even illness are weaknesses to be powered through. If exercise isn’t an option, then anxiety, irritability, guilt, or distress ensue. Twin B is also active and puts just as much effort into workouts as Twin A does. However, high-intensity workouts are choices, not obligations or imperatives. Activities are chosen based on safety and enjoyment. Rest and recovery are valid needs that are met, not flaws to be overcome. Form For Twin A, the shape, size, and weight of their body determine their worth as a person. Body parts exist to be sculpted into social-media approved contours. Keenly attuned to messages about what bodies and beliefs are acceptable, Twin A bounces between disgust at the reality of their body and embarrassment at the fact that they feel that disgust. Twin B understands that there is no single size or shape that signifies health or value and that bodies change with circumstance and time. They may not always feel confident about or love every aspect of their body, but they do have respect and appreciation for it and do their best to take good care of it.
Like Twin A, most Americans automatically equate being thin with being healthier and more attractive. But...when you think about it, it’s easy to see that’s not necessarily true. If you’re struggling with your relationship to food, fitness, or your form, visit The National Eating Disorders Association, and call SMC (218-387-2330) to set up an appointment with a member of our Behavioral Health team. |