Quotes of the Day

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Four humorous quotations each day from The Quotations Page
Updated: 4 hours 28 min ago

Greg Garcia

Fri, 10/10/2014 - 7:00pm
"That's the funny thing about havin' a kid. They come with their own set of problems; make everything else you were worried about seem kinda silly."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Paul Tillich

Fri, 10/10/2014 - 7:00pm
"Cynically speaking, one could say that it is true to life to be cynical about it."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Ann Landers

Fri, 10/10/2014 - 7:00pm
"Television has proved that people will look at anything rather than each other."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Tom Lehrer

Fri, 10/10/2014 - 7:00pm
"On my income tax 1040 it says 'Check this box if you are blind.' I wanted to put a check mark about three inches away."
Categories: Fun Stuff

John Dewey

Thu, 10/09/2014 - 7:00pm
"We can have facts without thinking but we cannot have thinking without facts."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Dennis Miller

Thu, 10/09/2014 - 7:00pm
"We need anything politically important rationed out like Pez: small, sweet, and coming out of a funny, plastic head."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Frank Zappa

Thu, 10/09/2014 - 7:00pm
"The United States is a nation of laws: badly written and randomly enforced."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Leonard Louis Levinson

Thu, 10/09/2014 - 7:00pm
"History is the short trudge from Adam to atom."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Robert Heinlein

Wed, 10/08/2014 - 7:00pm
"Progress isn't made by early risers. It's made by lazy men trying to find easier ways to do something."
Categories: Fun Stuff

G. K. Chesterton

Wed, 10/08/2014 - 7:00pm
"The men who really believe in themselves are all in lunatic asylums."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Benjamin H. Brewster

Wed, 10/08/2014 - 7:00pm
"A lawyer starts life giving $500 worth of law for $5 and ends giving $5 worth for $500."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Liza Minnelli

Wed, 10/08/2014 - 7:00pm
"Reality is something you rise above."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Randy K. Milholland

Tue, 10/07/2014 - 7:00pm
"It's not a matter of whether or not someone's watching over you. It's just a question of their intentions."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Lee Iacocca

Tue, 10/07/2014 - 7:00pm
"People want economy and they will pay any price to get it."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Jimmy Buffett

Tue, 10/07/2014 - 7:00pm
"We are the people our parents warned us about."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Alfred E. Wiggam

Tue, 10/07/2014 - 7:00pm
"A conservative is a man who believes that nothing should be done for the first time."
Categories: Fun Stuff