Quotes of the Day
Four humorous quotations each day from The Quotations Page
Updated: 4 hours 4 min ago
"Human salvation lies in the hands of the creatively maladjusted."
"What a blessing it would be if we could open and shut our ears as easily as we open and shut our eyes!"
"England and America are two countries separated by a common language."
"Look wise, say nothing, and grunt. Speech was given to conceal thought."
"The great thing about human language is that it prevents us from sticking to the matter at hand."
"There's a difference between a philosophy and a bumper sticker."
"This is the devilish thing about foreign affairs: they are foreign and will not always conform to our whim."
"What is youth except a man or a woman before it is ready or fit to be seen?"
"For most men life is a search for the proper manila envelope in which to get themselves filed."
"Today you can go to a gas station and find the cash register open and the toilets locked. They must think toilet paper is worth more than money."
"Computers can figure out all kinds of problems, except the things in the world that just don't add up."