Quotes of the Day
Four humorous quotations each day from The Quotations Page
Updated: 10 hours 22 min ago
"When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it had happened or not."
"I am extraordinarily patient, provided I get my own way in the end."
"Nobody knows the age of the human race, but everybody agrees that it is old enough to know better."
"The ability to delude yourself may be an important survival tool."
"If you're not scared or angry at the thought of a human brain being controlled remotely, then it could be this prototype of mine is finally starting to work."
"The major difference between a thing that might go wrong and a thing that cannot possibly go wrong is that when a thing that cannot possibly go wrong goes wrong it usually turns out to be impossible to get at or repair."
"The reason there is so little crime in Germany is that it's against the law."
"One machine can do the work of fifty ordinary men. No machine can do the work of one extraordinary man."
"Lies are like children: they're hard work, but it's worth it because the future depends on them."
"It takes too much energy to be against something unless it's really important."
"Someday we'll look back on this moment and plow into a parked car."