Quotes of the Day

Syndicate content Quotes of the Day
Four humorous quotations each day from The Quotations Page
Updated: 6 hours 52 min ago

Fran Lebowitz

Sun, 11/16/2014 - 6:00pm
"If you are a dog and your owner suggests that you wear a sweater, suggest that he wear a tail."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Bill Watterson

Sun, 11/16/2014 - 6:00pm
"Leave it to a girl to take the fun out of sex discrimination."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Robert Anton Wilson

Sun, 11/16/2014 - 6:00pm
"Cynics regarded everybody as equally corrupt... Idealists regarded everybody as equally corrupt, except themselves."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Frank Moore Colby

Sun, 11/16/2014 - 6:00pm
"Every improvement in communication makes the bore more terrible."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Kent Nichols and Douglas Sarine

Sat, 11/15/2014 - 6:00pm
"Here's a tip to avoid death by celebrity: First off, get a life. They can't touch you if you're out doing something interesting."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Leon Trotsky

Sat, 11/15/2014 - 6:00pm
"Old age is the most unexpected of all the things that happen to a man."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Doug Larson

Sat, 11/15/2014 - 6:00pm
"Few things are more satisfying than seeing your own children have teenagers of their own."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Joseph Stalin

Sat, 11/15/2014 - 6:00pm
"A single death is a tragedy; a million deaths is a statistic."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Ernie Kovacs

Fri, 11/14/2014 - 6:00pm
"Television � a medium. So called because it is neither rare nor well done."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Fletcher Knebel

Fri, 11/14/2014 - 6:00pm
"Smoking is one of the leading causes of statistics."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Maurice Chevalier

Fri, 11/14/2014 - 6:00pm
"Old age is not so bad when you consider the alternatives."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Edgar Wilson Nye

Fri, 11/14/2014 - 6:00pm
"Wagner's music is better than it sounds."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Peter Ustinov

Thu, 11/13/2014 - 6:00pm
"In America, through pressure of conformity, there is freedom of choice, but nothing to choose from."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Indira Gandhi

Thu, 11/13/2014 - 6:00pm
"You cannot shake hands with a clenched fist."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Henny Youngman

Thu, 11/13/2014 - 6:00pm
"When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Segal's Law

Thu, 11/13/2014 - 6:00pm
"A man with a watch knows what time it is. A man with two watches is never sure."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Michael Crichton

Wed, 11/12/2014 - 6:00pm
"Whenever you hear the consensus of scientists agrees on something or other, reach for your wallet, because you're being had."
Categories: Fun Stuff

David Russell

Wed, 11/12/2014 - 6:00pm
"We live in a Newtonian world of Einsteinian physics ruled by Frankenstein logic."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Henri Poincare

Wed, 11/12/2014 - 6:00pm
"Thought is only a flash between two long nights, but this flash is everything."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Oscar Levant

Wed, 11/12/2014 - 6:00pm
"I envy people who drink. At least they have something to blame everything on."
Categories: Fun Stuff