Quotes of the Day
Four humorous quotations each day from The Quotations Page
Updated: 7 hours 56 min ago
"I was born not knowing and have had only a little time to change that here and there."
"The cost of living is going up and the chance of living is going down."
"Talent hits a target no one else can hit; Genius hits a target no one else can see."
"I like to believe that people in the long run are going to do more to promote peace than our governments. Indeed, I think that people want peace so much that one of these days governments had better get out of the way and let them have it."
"A liberal is a man too broadminded to take his own side in a quarrel."
"I always find it more difficult to say the things I mean than the things I don't."
"Here's something to think about: How come you never see a headline like 'Psychic Wins Lottery'?"
"Nobody can be exactly like me. Sometimes even I have trouble doing it."
"Sometimes what's right isn't as important as what's profitable."
"The wit makes fun of other persons; the satirist makes fun of the world; the humorist makes fun of himself."
"That's the funny thing about havin' a kid. They come with their own set of problems; make everything else you were worried about seem kinda silly."
"Cynically speaking, one could say that it is true to life to be cynical about it."
"Television has proved that people will look at anything rather than each other."
"On my income tax 1040 it says 'Check this box if you are blind.' I wanted to put a check mark about three inches away."