Quotes of the Day

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Four humorous quotations each day from The Quotations Page
Updated: 11 hours 2 min ago

George Bernard Shaw

Sun, 02/26/2017 - 6:00pm
"Reading made Don Quixote a gentleman. Believing what he read made him mad."
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Samuel Butler

Sun, 02/26/2017 - 6:00pm
"The man who lets himself be bored is even more contemptible than the bore."
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E. Joseph Cossman

Sun, 02/26/2017 - 6:00pm
"Middle age is when your broad mind and narrow waist begin to change places."
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Marilyn Monroe

Sun, 02/26/2017 - 6:00pm
"Hollywood is a place where they'll pay you a thousand dollars for a kiss and fifty cents for your soul."
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Jeph Jacques

Sat, 02/25/2017 - 6:00pm
"That's what college is for - getting as many bad decisions as possible out of the way before you're forced into the real world. I keep a checklist of 'em on the wall in my room."
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George Orwell

Sat, 02/25/2017 - 6:00pm
"In a time of universal deceit, telling the truth is a revolutionary act."
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Bill Vaughan

Sat, 02/25/2017 - 6:00pm
"We learn something every day, and lots of times it's that what we learned the day before was wrong."
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Anatole France

Sat, 02/25/2017 - 6:00pm
"A person is never happy except at the price of some ignorance."
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Francois de La Rochefoucauld

Fri, 02/24/2017 - 6:00pm
"The glory of great men should always be measured by the means they have used to acquire it."
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P. J. O'Rourke

Fri, 02/24/2017 - 6:00pm
"There's a whiff of the lynch mob or the lemming migration about any overlarge concentration of like-thinking individuals, no matter how virtuous their cause."
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Minna Thomas Antrim

Fri, 02/24/2017 - 6:00pm
"Man forgives woman anything save the wit to outwit him."
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Doug Larson

Fri, 02/24/2017 - 6:00pm
"The cat could very well be man's best friend but would never stoop to admitting it."
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Peter Ustinov

Thu, 02/23/2017 - 6:00pm
"If the world should blow itself up, the last audible voice would be that of an expert saying it can't be done."
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Erma Bombeck

Thu, 02/23/2017 - 6:00pm
"Anybody who watches three games of football in a row should be declared brain dead."
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Mae West

Thu, 02/23/2017 - 6:00pm
"He who hesitates is a damned fool."
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James Magary

Thu, 02/23/2017 - 6:00pm
"Computers can figure out all kinds of problems, except the things in the world that just don't add up."
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Yogi Berra

Wed, 02/22/2017 - 6:00pm
"I didn't really say everything I said."
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Robert Benchley

Wed, 02/22/2017 - 6:00pm
"The surest way to make a monkey of a man is to quote him."
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Laurence J. Peter

Wed, 02/22/2017 - 6:00pm
"An economist is an expert who will know tomorrow why the things he predicted yesterday didn't happen today."
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Robert Heinlein

Wed, 02/22/2017 - 6:00pm
"Writing is not necessarily something to be ashamed of, but do it in private and wash your hands afterwards."
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