Quotes of the Day
Four humorous quotations each day from The Quotations Page
Updated: 5 hours 37 min ago
"I'm tired of all this nonsense about beauty being only skin-deep. That's deep enough. What do you want, an adorable pancreas?"
"But what is the difference between literature and journalism?/ ...Journalism is unreadable and literature is not read. That is all."
"The brain is a wonderful organ. It starts working the moment you get up in the morning and does not stop until you get into the office."
"Nobody believes the official spokesman... but everybody trusts an unidentified source."
"Why shouldn't things be largely absurd, futile, and transitory? They are so, and we are so, and they and we go very well together."
"Technology is a way of organizing the universe so that man doesn't have to experience it."
"Stuffed deer heads on walls are bad enough, but it's worse when they are wearing dark glasses and have streamers in their antlers because then you know they were enjoying themselves at a party when they were shot."
"An adventure is only an inconvenience rightly considered. An inconvenience is an adventure wrongly considered."
"Yes, we have to divide up our time like that, between our politics and our equations. But to me our equations are far more important, for politics are only a matter of present concern. A mathematical equation stands forever."
"People who work sitting down get paid more than people who work standing up."
"Silence propagates itself, and the longer talk has been suspended, the more difficult it is to find anything to say."
"Whenever you have an efficient government you have a dictatorship."
"Nothing changes your opinion of a friend so surely as success - yours or his."
"When a person cannot deceive himself the chances are against his being able to deceive other people."
"Ordinarily he was insane, but he had lucid moments when he was merely stupid."
"Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing."